It looks like Pauline’s back and just in the nick of time. Johnny’s ageing government is getting back its unofficial Minister For Australians Who Don’t Like To Be Called Bigots just in time for the next federal election. Hopefully she’ll be able to inject some new policy directions and with his trusty Pauline-to-English dictionary, Johnny will be dog-whistling up a storm just like old times.
However, 2007 is still going to be a tricky election year. Having gone windbag, invisible man, lunatic and recycled windbag as opposition leaders, the ALP have finally decided that it takes a nerd to beat a nerd.
Rather than just stealing all Pauline’s policies like last time, John needs to create some visual differentiation and actually become Pauline. A quick makeover involving a fright wig, a makeup trowel, a crimplene wardrobe and a reasonably firm blow to the head should do the trick.
Comments 66
been trying all night and for 2 weeks to contact pauline. Can u help me. Love this verse. Came upon it after 3 hours searching as I am new to the internet and am still learning. Did some canvassing for pauline in the country in WA last elections when she was around. Sent her mail and emails and keep getting rejected. I am dying to meet her and would love to have contact to see if there is anything I can do in WA for her. Regards maureen.
Posted 19 Feb 2007 at 12:15 am ¶No worries Maureen, next time I bump into Pauline, I’ll tell her you were trying to get in touch.
Posted 19 Feb 2007 at 4:33 pm ¶hi Kudelka, still trying, came upon this message by accident for Pauline. I suppose the more I fiddle the more I’ll learn. I am thrilled I found a response. Thanks for returning my query. Maureen
Posted 04 Mar 2007 at 12:06 am ¶Hi Kudelka, were you being sarcastic when u said “next time I bump into Pauline”
Posted 04 Mar 2007 at 12:27 am ¶or are u not really a Pauline Fan. Maureen
Maureen, I think Pauline might be avoiding me as I haven’t seen her for quite a few weeks though I don’t know why this would be as the restraining order was lifted months ago.
It is also possible that she may have caught tuberculosis or AIDS off an African immigrant. I know she was very worried about that happening as she does a lot of work helping these unfortunate people feel welcome in our country and that increases her chances of infection. She is Australia’s Mother Theresa in my opinion.
If I do see her, I promise I will mention you were trying to contact her.
Posted 04 Mar 2007 at 1:39 pm ¶Sorry kudelka, still can’t work out if u are a supporter or not. Maybe I am getting too old for this internet thing. I just know that Pauline talks the Aussie language and if the Aussie was looked after like it looks after the rest of the world we would have populated our Country without having to listen to jibba in every shop we go. I ask myself ‘where am I’ when i go to the local shop. Why do these imigrants talk in there own language in front of us. If we were in there country we would be shot. Sorry but I am Aussie born and am sad that our govt did not look after us and am worried for my grand children
Posted 06 Mar 2007 at 1:16 am ¶Don’t worry about the internet Maureen, it is full of foreigners jibbaing away in their own languages very rudely and when I tell them to go back where they came from they just laugh foreignly at me and continue to jibba in a frankly terrorist fashion.
Posted 06 Mar 2007 at 8:25 am ¶I was also down at the local shop and I asked the proprietor (who was of the darker skinned variety but very polite) “where am I?” and she said (in quite good English) “why, you are in the local shop, sir”. I don’t see why the government can’t put up signs in local shops saying such things as “this is a local shop for local people, there’s nothing for you here” and “no jibbaing or you will be shot like you would be in your country” so that real Aussies don’t get confused and have to ask. I pay taxes you know.
still find it hard to read your comments. I would’nt say anything in fear of getting bashed. I am just an Aussie born grand mother concerned for our Country and my Grand Children. We Night clubbed all night safely, and now my daughter and son-in-law will not feel safe unless they follow them to a night club. I still regard everyone equal and thats how god sees us, but at the moment there is bad in every race. You are very clever with your phrasing and I find it hard to understand. Were u born in Australia. It does not matter to me. I just want Australia safe where I am not a prisoner in my own home, and my grandies to feel safe and enjoy what I did in my teens.
Posted 06 Mar 2007 at 11:48 pm ¶I am a pensioner now and have paid all the taxes I am ever going to pay. I have worked three jobs at once to survive and raise two children. This is why I say, why didn’t the govt look after the Aussie and I would have been able to stay home instead of my two teenagers running amuck
Posted 06 Mar 2007 at 11:57 pm ¶after school because I was working to try and survive. My first born took her first steps while I was scrubbing a floor at 1am in the morning. I drove for miles to have
them babysat while I worked. Enough from me, goodnight.
how do I find Pauline hanson
Posted 06 Mar 2007 at 11:58 pm ¶Pauline herself once told me that my correct use of such things as the apostrophe, spelling etc does make my prose somewhat confusing and unAustralian. I am attempting to rectify the matter with excessive alcohol abuse, but the brain damage refuses to take. There are only so many shandies one can drink before one’s stomach gets too full.
Posted 07 Mar 2007 at 10:07 am ¶It is indeed true that Night Clubbing has become a perilous occupation in this modern day and age. I remember when we could go out Night Clubbing for hours on end drinking shandies and other such intoxicating beverages until we vomited freely and without shame. Sadly those days are gone now and me and my wife have to hire armed security guards to accompany our one year old to Night Clubs to make sure she doesn’t buy a dodgy ecstasy tablet or some such thing.
I don’t understand why our Government which is subsidised by the taxes of Hard Working Aussie Born taxpayers has allowed our Night Clubs to fall into such a deplorable state.
I was discussing exactly this problem with Pauline not weeks ago and somebody said the blame should be on mothers who don’t stay home to look after their children as God intended, but She said that that was being unfair and that sometimes mothers had to work to support their children as best they can and they deserve Praise and Compassion. She said we should really blame jibbaing foreigners for this Night Clubbing problem and all other problems because foreigners do not have any Right to try to support their children as best they can and do not deserve our Compassion or Praise.
That is what we Aussies call a Fair Go and if they can’t understand that they should Go Back Where They Came From.
You find Pauline Hanson by having Faith and letting Her into your life. That is the only way.
hi maureen, thanks for the kind words. as you may have heard, i’m running for the senate, and will make safe night clubbing a cornerplank keystone of my manifesto.
Posted 07 Mar 2007 at 2:49 pm ¶hi Pauline, This is why I am trying to find u because I canvassed for u in Kukerin, not far from Wagin. I need to know if you need any help from over here. I have been writing emails etc for weeks and keep getting rejected, to tell you I will pay the taxi fares from this end. I sent photos and a letter when u were so wrongly detained but never heard back. Please stay in touch
Posted 07 Mar 2007 at 10:42 pm ¶regards Maureen
Hi Kudelka, you talk in riddles to me. I have faith and am at the moment studying the bible with a friend. What I am saying is that Mothers should not have to go to work and leave there children if the govt had looked after them properly. Why have children when u have to leave them. My mother was 50 and me 17 when she went to work. The children are not supervised after school and thats when the trouble and stealing starts. The women who have children to 4 or 5 different fathers are looked after better than the housewife who if forced to work and leave her new born because they won’t survive if she doesn’t. Pauline has made contact~~~~or was that you pretending.
Posted 07 Mar 2007 at 10:56 pm ¶I haven’t received your messages Maureen. The time in stir was hell. Mainly single mums and others who turned to crime when they couldn’t get a toehold in the workplace. Why can’t they just stay at home? Thanks for the offer of a taxi ride, but be careful you don’t get a bad egg from overseas taking you for a ride.
Posted 08 Mar 2007 at 8:40 am ¶Hi Pauline, is this really u or Kudelka writing to me. I mean’t from the taxi ride when u said on tv you would pay the taxi fares for the immigrants to go home. What do u mean by a bad egg from overseas. I am at a stage in my life where I don’t care what anyone does to me. I would just like to see u back in there for the Aussie.
Posted 08 Mar 2007 at 9:35 pm ¶Pauline I believe that this is not u and that Kudelka is playing with me. Is there any reason I cannot contact u on your email address or by phone.
Posted 08 Mar 2007 at 10:05 pm ¶You have a fan base over here and I am only here to help, I have been a supporter for years. Met the Wagin boys and still have your posters. regards Maureen
Hi Maureen (or should I say Pauleen?!!). Although it is very difficult to conceal your true identity on the internet, the very cunning can do so I am told. I am beginning to suspect you are one of those people who pretend to be Pauline Fans while actually doing so for the purposes of secretly Mocking Her and Her Followers in an Ironic Fashion behind their backs.
Posted 11 Mar 2007 at 2:13 pm ¶I was first made Suspicious by the similarities between “Maureen” (your alleged name) and “Pauleen” (the imposter pretending to be PaulINE (and I bring to your attention the correct spelling of her name although I am sure You Well Know the difference and were spelling it incorrectly to see if I would notice).
Please stop taking me, Pauline’s Legion of Fans and Pauline Herself for the Fools that We so clearly Are.
Sorry, did not notice the spelling mistake in
Posted 12 Mar 2007 at 7:39 pm ¶Pauleen. I was just thrilled that my email was answered because I came upon it by accident and it takes me quite a while to find this site again. When I canvassed in the bush a couple of people said I was a look alike. I can understand that she would be very suspicious of everyone and it’s sad because I rang a One nation rep over here a long time ago (can’t remember his name) to ask him if she was alright and he said she was back on her property. I am a grandmother from Perth with a 13yr old granddaughter and a 10 year old grandson just trying to find out if I can help because I have been a supporter all the way. Sorry u had to send your offensive email, I was named after Maureen O’Hara the movie star and was
born in 1946. Had an 18yr &13yr old brothers and my dad waited 18 yrs for me. I was very much adored and had a wonderful childhood. I wish I had the guts to do what Pauleen is doing. All my best wishes to her and I’ll be following her progress. I will be offline for 7 days until I have bigpond connected hoping I will enjoy the internet more when it is faster and has more memory Bye Kudelka. regards Maureen
Maureen, just stumbled onto this site, I am also trying to contact Pauline
My mail has been returned
Is this site for real, or just another sick site
I would seriously like to contact Pauline
Posted 30 Mar 2007 at 1:36 pm ¶Another Western Australian
Hi Rilivon, I was talking to Pauline at her book launch the other day, and she said she was worried that Maureen was actually David Oldfield stalking her under a nom be plume as she alleges he likes to dress in women’s clothing and pretend to be from Western Australia. This is actually a more common fetish than you would think. If you want to get in touch with Pauline, I suggest you find some way of proving you are not actually David Oldfield in drag as all Western Australians instantly arouse her suspicions, especially as they are so far away they are virtually foreigners.
Posted 30 Mar 2007 at 1:52 pm ¶Just as I thought, another waste of ink
Posted 30 Mar 2007 at 10:08 pm ¶We are far ahead of you
…but somewhat lagging in the area of computer monitor technology, it seems.
Posted 31 Mar 2007 at 6:07 pm ¶Hey Kudelka, its Maureen again and just as I thought you are a sick F………….
Posted 09 Apr 2007 at 11:42 pm ¶sorry if Pauline has anything to do with you
and I’ll just watch her on TV now because I couldn’t be bothered canvassing again.
Hi Rilivon, you are just another sucker like me and I really cannot bother with the sarco remarks anymore. I stumbled on this site by accident too and have been
disgusted with the comments made. I have followed Pauline since day one and agree with every thing she stands for as an Aussie. F………….Daviel Oldfield as well
Hey rilivon, what a nasty comment you received. I can’t believe what he says.
Posted 09 Apr 2007 at 11:51 pm ¶I thought pauline liked the West. She had a lot to do with Wagin and I canvassed for her in Kukerin, not far from Wagin. I am a grandmother with time on her hands and would have liked to help this end if she needed it but with friends like Kudelka I couldn’t be bothered
Hey Kudelka, if I had known, like you about her book release, I would have flown over
Posted 09 Apr 2007 at 11:57 pm ¶to be there, that’s how dumb you are.
Hi Maureen, I’m sorry you missed Pauline’s book launch. It was a great night, let me tell you!
Pauline asked after you, but thought perhaps you hadn’t made it through security as Western Australians (especially those dressed up as elderly women) have been profiled as High Risk which under the circumstances I’m sure you can understand.
I said I was probably just too dumb for you to have known that the launch was on, but she said that didn’t really make sense.
Posted 10 Apr 2007 at 9:46 am ¶You are sicker than I thought. You are not worth my time to talk to. Why didn’t you give Pauline my contact so I could talk to her. This will be my last contact. You are too sarco to communicate with.
Posted 11 Apr 2007 at 12:30 am ¶to put it more plainly you are an arse hole
Posted 11 Apr 2007 at 1:29 am ¶and just because I am a grandmother does not mean I am too old to pumble your arse either. Us West Australians would leave you for dead. We live in the best state in Australia. You are really annoying me now so f……………..off
Now Maureen, it’s exactly this arse-pumbling behaviour that gives West Australians such a bad name. We simply don’t pumble people’s arses over here on the Eastern seaboard and you Westerners just refuse to integrate into civilised society.
Posted 11 Apr 2007 at 9:08 am ¶I can’t in all conscience put you in contact with Pauline as I’m sure you can understand a Lady of her stature can’t have West Australian anal-fixated grannies who may or may not be David Oldfield in drag pumbling her arse and leaving her for dead. It’s a security issue, so please don’t take offence.
Ha ha ha ha….you guys are funny.
Posted 11 Apr 2007 at 3:10 pm ¶There should be no resourt to swaring.
Though this arugement is compleaty and uttly usesless. I just have to say grow up. Even if your 108 i don’t care you grow up and become responible for your actions.
whats pumble your arse mean,is it One Nation code for i love you
Posted 20 Apr 2007 at 12:53 pm ¶What a gem of a thread. This was even funnier than the cartoon. Onya K.
Posted 25 Apr 2007 at 11:16 pm ¶Hi Pauleen i just want to say we are %100 with you thank you for your courage and veiws,we can all see through the sterotyping and the mud slinging that was thrown at you only by the controlling government that didnt like a woman turning their key in the door of the old boys club,australia longs for change and not chains,we love you pauleen.
Posted 26 Apr 2007 at 2:21 am ¶You blokes are a crackup, just as big crackup as Pauline herself
Posted 27 Apr 2007 at 8:17 pm ¶This is priceless! How can I forward it to my friends?
Posted 04 May 2007 at 9:48 am ¶Hi Pritam, just click the “share this” link at the bottom of each post and follow your nose. Otherwise, cut and paste the address into an email and failing that, walk around wearing an enormous placard with “www.101usesforajohnhoward.com” written on it.
Actually, just go with the placard idea.
Posted 06 May 2007 at 10:11 am ¶maureen rivilon dazza
i think my arse has been pumbeled
“SHE IS BACK”
and she aint happy
http://www.smh.com.au/news/national/now-paulines-for-a-united-australia/2007/05/24/1179601573572.htm
please write soon
Posted 24 May 2007 at 9:52 pm ¶luv arsepumbler
Hey Gusface, Can’t raise this website and have not heard any news on Pauline at all.
Posted 05 Jun 2007 at 12:29 am ¶Maureen
If i tell you where she is you must promise not to tell any of those pretend Pauline lovers.
Posted 06 Jun 2007 at 10:53 am ¶Now to the best of my knowledge she has been staying in sydney at an undisclosed location.
It is on the harbour and has lots of lovely gardens for her to contemplate her policy.
The only problem is come september she will have to move for a week or two as there will be funny coloured people visiting her hosts.
Dont worry cause i hear Tuckey will put her up at his pub and he might show her his ironbar.
must go marie-jeanette wants to order some cakes…
You talk the same shit as Kudelka bye
Posted 06 Jun 2007 at 10:36 pm ¶The pumbling’s in the mail, gusface.
Posted 07 Jun 2007 at 10:56 am ¶Kudelka was is maureen upset
i could give her the phone number but it is always engaged
Posted 08 Jun 2007 at 2:09 pm ¶apparently the kids are always on the internet thingy blogging away as pseudo intellectuals
anyway keep on pumbling maureen
I found her
Posted 14 Jun 2007 at 9:42 pm ¶Maureen
Posted 15 Jun 2007 at 1:47 pm ¶was it in the front or the back passage of kirribilli
smartarse
Posted 15 Jun 2007 at 10:37 pm ¶oh so it was the back passage
who else was up there??
Posted 18 Jun 2007 at 3:59 pm ¶The Hefferman,Shamaman,Mildo
and of course Dolly perhaps
Hello
I am Paul, Pauline’s son. How dare you sick people sardonically poke fun at my beloved mother?!
Posted 10 Jul 2007 at 5:01 pm ¶well paul maureens my mum so there
Posted 11 Jul 2007 at 4:51 pm ¶this is great! i cant believe people actually like her - shs a sadistic racist bitch! and btw, God loves us all (not for our colour skin) and who gives a damn where they live? hahahahahaha. btw, maureen, we all work for people, whether it be husbands, wives, kids or ourselves but we dont complain. thats the way of life kiddo. people have had it rougher than you, believe me.
Posted 02 Aug 2007 at 11:43 am ¶So, you’re in here, gusface, making trouble as usual, stirring up racists and zenophobes, cinophobes, xylophones? Anyway, it’s just not on. Come out of there, young man - you are going to get the pumbling of your life!
Posted 15 Aug 2007 at 9:13 am ¶oh pattipat to be young man again why i can well remember those days with my favourite girl by my side as i sang ‘im a lumber jack and im ok, i dont know about asians and what the hells gay?”
Posted 15 Aug 2007 at 1:39 pm ¶but then pattipat the jibba-jabbing started and well you know the rest-
and so as part of my aversion therapy i must commune with my nemesis to gain redemption from eternal damnation and endless jibba-jabbing
Is this be good idea to poke those things at Ms Hansons. Maybe she get angy and tell gorgeous and beautiful man Howards. Then we all be in big trouble, plento. Mine thinks not to say “hanson” in puclics places is good thing to do so as not to open can of squirms.
Posted 15 Aug 2007 at 2:22 pm ¶lol
Posted 16 Aug 2007 at 5:19 am ¶Oh well, if you feel that’s your fate, gusface, needs must as the devil drives - or something. God speed you on your unholy work, old fellow, you have a lot of work to do. Don’t break anything in the process.
Hanson cites Bible urination as reason to stop immigration
now pauline this is disgusting letting your dirty laundry air on national tv and after everything maureen and i have done you go and relive your time with david and then confuses it with your koran studies classes (high distinction)
i think pauline needs the pumbling now
Posted 16 Aug 2007 at 11:57 am ¶Hey gusface, Gee that name suits you. How dare you place my name in your message. I am 100% for Pauline and I am talking to her only, do not mention my name again on this site. Also do you think you could possibly talk english or Australian instead of the jibber you message or go back to where you came from until you can
Posted 19 Aug 2007 at 12:43 am ¶Pauline did a good job speaking out about the Aliens invading our humble lifestyle.
Posted 19 Aug 2007 at 6:59 am ¶Thanks to Howard, i have to work with non english speaking new australians.
How the f**k did they pass the imigration test and how the f**k did they get a job before my best mate did??
maushine (oops i put your name on this site) what exactly is australian or english maybe you mean englisee or austrainem
i just dont know
ps maushine (oops i mentioned your name again) doesnt sound like a very australian name to me are you one of those who infiltrated pauline from within but really where from overseas
pps i asked mum if i could go back where i came from and she just clipped me around the ear-maybe i can ask yours?
Posted 20 Aug 2007 at 2:17 pm ¶she should have clipped you harder arshole.
Posted 20 Aug 2007 at 11:55 pm ¶mine isn’t around anymore f————-off
Pauline hanson… just a loud mouth ugly racist bitch with a lot of useless opinions. No wonder why Oldfield denied sleeping with her in motel. She’s cheap and trashy and nevertheless a shameful image of a wonderfully multicultural society. Looks like we asians and immigrants wont be going no where for a long time, so suck it up eh? she should really go back to cooking chips and fish, but with a scandalous reputation, hence jail sentence , i wouldnt trust her cooking my chips either.
Posted 27 Aug 2007 at 6:50 pm ¶maushine and dam2good
LOL - didnt your mother taught you a thing or two about morals? perphaps the immigrants needs to make a living to support their families, whether they know how to speak english or not, eventually they’ll learn. No body needs to be told to go back to their country, if so.. do go back to your convict boats and give the land back to the aboriginal people. Immigrants atleast got here without guns and weapon, diseases and all other shit that was on the convict boats, then claiming that it is their land,hence going around raping indigenous children and taking their children away from their parents.Imigrants got here as a means of survival from war, poverty and so forth. You racist bitches who call yourself ‘authentic australians’ but discriminate should take a class in tolerance, acceptance and appreciation of various cultures.
Posted 27 Aug 2007 at 7:02 pm ¶hey maushine
“what is clipping your harder arsehole”
is this more paulinespeak
please explain
Posted 01 Sep 2007 at 9:34 am ¶watever
interesting what you wrote about Pauline and Davie, is that what she meant about genital mutilation, did her falsies have a loose wire?
Posted 01 Sep 2007 at 5:11 pm ¶Hey, gooseface what happened to our DNA
Posted 05 Sep 2007 at 2:29 am ¶test. I see it’s been deleted from the site
I think maushine’s coming on to you, gusface.
Posted 05 Sep 2007 at 7:34 am ¶maushine
or should i say moonshine
the DNA test is only for the true Paulineites and was until recently available on her site ….problem was getting the samples into the modem
from now on send the samples (used undies preferred )
to
The Erected Vessel
c/- Kirribilli House
Att: Saint Pauline
ps mark package as liberal party policy statement to ensure quicker processing
give my love to all at FF
Posted 06 Sep 2007 at 4:41 pm ¶Trackbacks & Pingbacks 2
[...] cartoon engendered one of the best comment columns I have ever seen! Head on over and check it out. There is some great Aussie larrikin stuff going [...]
[...] he wasn’t doing that for the last 10 years, we mightn’t see the divisiveness which he, Hanson Style, has introduced to this great country. Looking forward to becoming a citizen now, though Rudd is [...]
Post a Comment