The unemployed: dole bludgers, job snobs, malingering parasites or just plain lazy? These days, the government has made taking the bins out enough to get you defined as a member of the workforce, so there’s really no bloody excuse whatsoever.
Much has been made of solving the problem of the welfare trap which essentially makes unemployment more desirable than getting a job. This skirts the real issue of the humiliation trap, which is when receiving the dole is less demeaning than taking a shitty job on low pay.
Fortunately after a long hiatus, the Howard government is again seeking to make being unemployed much more humiliating than mucking out the toilets at the local diahorrhea clinic for minimum wage. Dole bludgers will now be required to write 5000 word essays in their dole diaries detailing exactly why they are such underachieving failures which they must read out in a loud, clear voice while bolted into stocks outside the local Centrelink office and being pelted by rotten tomatoes which they will be required to pick in advance as part of their work-for-the-dole obligation.
Hopefully, this public shaming will force these freeloaders to clean up their act, right after they’ve cleaned up the rotten tomato pulp, which they will be allowed to take home for their dinner for a small deduction in their fortnightly benefit.
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