FREE ANTI-INDIGESTION FRIDGE MAGNET

John Howard fridge magnet

Official studies have shown that there will be more casualties caused by nervous flatulence and terror-induced eructation in this country than will ever be caused by direct terror attack.

To celebrate the 50th Use of a John Howard, we at John Howard Central Command have commissioned a special edition Anti-Indigestion Fridge Magnet to protect against any reflux induced by the War On Terror1.

To receive one magnet, simply send us your address in the contact form below and we’ll post one out, free of charge (sorry - postage inside Australia only as we have to protect our borders).

If you want two magnets, the principle of Mutual Obligation requires you to write a haiku extolling the virtues of the John Howard as well as sending your address. Most amusing efforts to be stuck up for all to savour.

There are only 101 magnets to give away, so don’t get too comfortable and relaxed until you’ve secured your fridge’s future.

More information regarding the haiku can be found here, but as mutual obligation essentially involves busy work, feel free to do a half-arsed job.

1Magnets are only to be placed on fridges that have been certified free from terrorists and WMD by a Federally Certified Fridge Inspector.

Comments 10

  1. TERRY wrote:

    Peter Costello should buy John Howard a well oiled hair piece[to match Kim Jon Il\'s] and some slippery highly polished shoes!
    So when he assumes the position behind the King of the World[GEORGE the second]
    woops– George. W.
    A slight nudge might mean a vanishing JOHN, or, turn one last kiss into a constipated George W. leaving the deputies [well George\'s govenor of Australia] alternately known as the prime ministership available!!!

    Posted 22 Oct 2006 at 2:16 pm
  2. Gracie wrote:

    a pair of chopsticks
    evil miso soup defies them
    george and johnny

    Posted 17 Nov 2006 at 6:50 am
  3. Terry wrote:

    John Howard, teller of tales,fantasies to fit the occasion,fabulous fables to fool the masses,the truth twisted, illusions performed.
    Johnny’s qualifications for work after politics!

    Posted 23 Nov 2006 at 9:28 pm
  4. Stephen Fisher wrote:

    John Howard PM to 2020

    Posted 02 Jan 2007 at 7:30 am
  5. Michael Potter wrote:

    Small grasshopper
    More of man than
    Little Johnnie

    Posted 02 Jan 2007 at 9:53 am
  6. Heather Potter wrote:

    where is the person
    who can help me survive
    this all enveloping tide?

    Posted 17 Feb 2007 at 9:25 am
  7. darren webb-johnson wrote:

    Introduction to the letter “H”
    “H” is for House,
    “H” is for Howard,
    And “H” is for Hitler.

    Posted 09 Mar 2007 at 2:34 pm
  8. viv wrote:

    Go Johnny…..Your are all we’ve got!

    Posted 28 Mar 2007 at 10:04 am
  9. Dan wrote:

    a war on terror
    should be war on wars
    war is terror

    Posted 27 Sep 2007 at 3:03 pm
  10. the kid next door wrote:

    ha ha what a tool

    Posted 26 Nov 2007 at 2:31 pm

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